.....

Its late, I cant sleep. Im lying in bed, typing from my phone. I was sent to bed an hour ago at least...My brain wont shut off. A million thoughts a minute, speeding by so quickly, I cant grab hold of one to let it complete... So much has gone on - without anything going on, if that makes any sense whatsoever...hahahaha! I know, it sounds nuts...it probably is...but I don't care... I'm tired and have to be up early.... There is this weird sense of empowerment that has been bestowed upon me and I know who I can attribute it to, aside from myself...And I wish I could give thanks, proper thanks, meaninful thanks....I'm not sure I'm capable of describing how it came about, exactly. Small but encouraging ways over time culminating today or was it yesterday. Doesn't matter...Just hope it lasts...this new attitude...this new feeling.... A note to my benefactor:

I wish I could tell you how much your support and encouragement and friendship has meant to me. Just funny because I did not expect it from you, of all people - please don't take that wrong. I've always thought you to be a pretty great person. I just didn't know how far reaching that greatness extended, or that it would ever be extended to me. Thanks are not enough. Today, as we talked, tears welled up in my eyes - it wasn't that you said anything so profound today, but there was something about the way you said things that really struck a chord with me. I stopped feeling so helpless and hapless. I know what you'd say right about now if you were hearing me say all this and it makes me giggle. I just hope you know that everything you have done for me has been appreciated. Even the little things have not gone unnoticed. I sometimes get the impression that you're operating on instinct which impresses the hell out of me. Anyway, thank you. Much love, my friend.

Well this has been hard enough to type on my phone. I think I'm going to try sleep again.