Friday, May 25, 2012

Happiness and Heartache...

So today marks the one year anniversary of my nephew coming to live with us. I am such a proud aunt. That's the happiness.

The heartache is due to a confirmation of information coming to light that has forced me to decline any involvement in the adoption process for fear that it could have a negative impact. I can't risk someone else's happiness. Not someone I love.

I'm too embarrassed and ashamed to explain....It was a good thing to find out once and for all though - as tough as it was to hear.

It's funny how Josh's lies, thoughtlessness and selfishness have had such a widespread impact.

But that's how a child behaves - completely self centered with no ability to step outside of themselves and see how their actions impact anyone but themselves.

Anyway, enough of that. Today truly is a day of celebration.

Plus, the other happiness is that I think the gift should arrive today - I'm excited, but I think I am more excited to return the favor. I've come up with something suitable, I think. It's a care package of sorts - with my own personal...flair...(read as glitter, tin foil, glue, stickers, possibly feathers, ribbons and other random odds and ends).

I bet I cry when I open it....I can be such a girl sometimes. Yeesh. But I think it's one of the kindest, sweetest, most thoughtful things I've ever been given. I can't wait - he'll be the recipient of the first missive I pen....I've already been composing things in my head.

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12:30 pm...

What a glorious day! Its lunchtime now and I'm outside enjoying this amazing weather. Wish I were spending it at the lakefront with an iced coffee and a good book.

I must shop this weekend! My last shopping attempt failed miserably. I wound up arguing with a guy over a parking space. At which point I drove off before I did something rash. lol. I had visions of popping his tires so he could spend a little more time enjoying that space. I am not cut out for city dwelling, let alone city shopping.

I digress...I am still mulling over the gift. I want it to be perfect.Ive got lots of ideas but I'm still missing one thing. The Thing. The one that says exactly what I'm feeling - though, that isn't clearly defined yet.

Sigh...it'll come...I hope...