Wednesday, February 28, 2007

31

Well, thirty-one started out ok I suppose, got worse and then got a little better. I find that as I get older, my birthdays are more stressful. Oh to be 10 again and having a carefree day centered around you...sigh....but I am lucky and I know it. I am surrounded by wonderful, caring people who all want to celebrate my life. And, frankly, I don't need much more than that.

THANK YOU!

You know who you are! You are all of those who have made me smile, who I call friend, who I am lucky enough to share genes with, those who get me through the tough days and who celebrate the sunny days with me...You are all of those who care! You are what makes this life a really good one. I owe you guys so much more than just thanks. I hope you know how much I love you all!!!

Wednesday, February 21, 2007

The Mother Ship!!!!!!!!!!

Ok, during my daily surf I found this:

http://spamusement.com/index.php

....and I felt as if the Mothership had landed.

"Oh how I've missed you, Mother!"

There are more freaks like me out there who are plagued by high-larious spam messages that conjure up such bizarre and amusing images (not to mention the sheer poetry of some) - AND LOVE IT......sigh......I haven't delved very deep but I think I am in heaven.

I can't believe it. Its like home. I think about omprellas and Dora who wrote "in my tyrannosaurus" all of the time.

I've been spammed by Susan T. Approvals, Burlap K. Notebook, Payloads L. Trivet and Engender P. Flagship and Pantyhose C. Kwangju....And I take such pleasure in it! Thank you Pantyhose (may I just call you Panty?).....



(Soon, I'll move my Spammish information over to the new site. Spammish is the language of the spammers. Some friends and I had been working on a Spammish to English dictionary but I'll go into more detail about that later.)

Monday, February 19, 2007

.....crazy....

maybe i am crazy. who knows. who cares. music that usually soothes just irritates. i cant sit still but i dont want to move. fingers type words, mouth creates words. meaningless words. all these damn words. words i dont understand. words. i dont even know what they mean. or why ive said them. it doesnt matter. none of it matters. i wish i could be ejected into space. i would love to float weightless. no impact. i would revel in the nothingness. all this stuff is around me. crowding me. wanting things from me. a response. a feeling. something. like waving a gnat off. i slap at the words. i want them to stop. or go. i dont know which. im on the verge of tears at all times. the slightest change in pressure and im broken. and none of it does any good. my words are useless. i am ineffective........sigh.........

Saturday, February 17, 2007

Welcome to my new blog...

Ok, so its not much. I've been distracted by school, work, snow and the like. I am going to try to incorporate this blog into the new web site I've been working on. We'll see how it goes!

I was trying to write about myself in the little About Me area and I ran out of things. I don't know myself right now it seems. I don't know what else to say. Its a repeat of what's on my Home page and its very dull.

I think I may be very dull....sigh...that's fine I suppose. I've long given up on those lofty thoughts of making an impact - leaving my mark, as it were. I am destined for a quiet life. One of little consequence. Which, I suppose, is fine. Its all fine. I'm fine.

She says that's my phrase. That's what I say. I'm fine. And its true. I am fine. I will be fine. I was fine.

One of the definitions of fine is "being satisfactory or in satisfactory condition" which I think I am most days. I don't know. And some days, I am "free from impurities" - another definition of fine....I think I strive to be "
characterized by elegance or refinement or accomplishment" but I don't think I ever get quite there......who knows.

For now, I am, fine.